Who understands me?

I grew up in an ordinary family and used to have a happy marital life. However, good things did not endure. The appearance of an affair shattered my sweet dream. Scared of facing a divorce, I had no courage to tell my maiden family of what happened. All along I adopted an evasive attitude and dared not contact them. I lived alone and faced all the difficulties alone. What's more, I became addicted to the strange habit of stealing because not of financial problem but of an obsession. I was arrested, penalized, bound over, subject to social service orders and probation orders time and again. I faced everything by myself even when I was ordered to be detained in the Tai Lam Centre for Women for 14 days pending a psychological report. No one visited me during those 14 days and I was very upset. Not aware of the seriousness of the situation, I again ran into trouble shortly afterwards. I was not so lucky this time and was sentenced to one year's imprisonment. This was a bolt from the blue. My mind was all blank. Upon arrival at the Tai Lam Centre for Women, I was told to complete a list of visitors. Without completing the form, I returned it to the staff. They were very shocked upon seeing the form. They told me that life would be miserable if there was no visitor at all during a period as long as a year. Hearing this, I could not help crying. How could they understand my situation!

The unexpected.

A week later, I finally decided to inform members of my maiden family through the social welfare officer. Shortly after receiving my news, they visited me. It was beyond my expectation that we met in prison after not being in touch and not seeing one another for 18 years. I had mixed feelings of excitement and sadness.

During the initial period of detention, I was arranged to work in the library. Time dragged. By chance, I joined a religious class with the intention of joining some interest classes to kill time. I hoped that time would go by more quickly. To my surprise, I felt good after each gathering and I looked forward to the religious class every week.

The Lord listens to prayer.

Whilst I worked in the library, time went by very slowly. According to other inmates, time flied for those who worked in the kitchen though the work there was extremely hard. I was not afraid of hard work. My only wish was that time could fly. However, whether to work in the kitchen was for the centre, not for me, to decide. Furthermore, the staff concerned had indicated that they would not consider me for a transfer because my term was short. At a subsequent session of the religious class, a volunteer told me that the Lord would listen to our prayers. At this early stage, I didn't know the Lord Jesus well. With skepticism I prayed to the Lord before I went to bed. I told the Lord about my wish and I promised Him that I would persevere no matter how hard the work in the kitchen was. I repeated the same prayer continuously every night. Finally, a miracle appeared! In less than a week, I was transferred to work in the kitchen. At that moment, I still doubted whether the Lord had really answered my prayers or whether it was a mere coincidence.

The Lord is gracious to me.

Time flied during the 5- month period when I worked in the kitchen. But the work was really hard. Not only were the working hours longer, but there was no supply of hot or warm water during winter nights when I took a bath after off duty. Recalling those memories, I cannot believe I could have gone through such difficult times! Believe it or not, I did pray every night, begging the Lord to give me faith and perseverance to overcome all the hardships. Things turned bad when an inmate from elsewhere was transferred to work in the kitchen. She had a poor attitude and was lazy. What's more, her bossy attitude and kicking around caused me to lose temper and shed tears behind people's back on several occasions. I had no alternative but to tell the Lord everything and prayed that I could stay away from this inmate. Unexpectedly, I was transferred one day later. As my Dad was worried about my working in the kitchen, he was very happy to learn about the transfer. In order not to make my Dad worried, I prayed to the Lord that I could complete my term peacefully.

Though my first concern upon release was to look for a job, I strongly believed that the Lord would arrange it for me. Within a month, I found an ideal job and life was back to normal.

Fogs cleared. My mind turned God-wards